With Barack Obama's popularity growing and new polling data showing he's seen as being likely to fuck up the whole election and hand the keys to the White House over to John McCain, Hillary's pulling out the really really long knives. Five of them, in fact…

…the campaign of Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton is now unleashing what one Clinton aide called a "kitchen sink" fusillade against Mr. Obama, pursuing five lines of attack since Saturday in hopes of stopping his political momentum.

The effort underscores not only Mrs. Clinton's recognition that the next round of primaries — in Ohio and Texas on March 4 — are must-win contests for her. It also reflects her advisers' belief that they can persuade many undecided voters to embrace her at the last minute by finally drawing sharply worded, attention-grabbing contrasts with Mr. Obama.

Oh, man! That's scary. You don't want to be around when Hillary lets loose all five of her attacks at once.

If Obama has any chance of survival, he'll need to travel to Mount Everthirst and obtain the head of the Golden Basilisk. Only after hurling the magical beast's head into the Well of Dreams will he be deemed worthy of training in five-armed battle by the Misty Wizard Count Hvroolock. One thing's for sure, it won't be easy.

I had a 12-level drow elf that came this close to achieving all that once, but then some stupid orc totally rolled a critical hit against him and he was slain. I was so pissed.