Indecision Internationale: London Mayoral Election – Dirty Old London Town
Tired of American politics? Then why not look overseas and take solace that it's not quite as insane as the London Mayoral election taking place today? Some limey named Rich Johnston remains our intrepid guide:
The morning sun sparkles across the Thames River, twisting and turning, bisecting the city, dividing it as much as the London Mayoral election has. On one bank, the twice incumbent Labour candidate Ken. On the other, the buffoonishly Conservative candidate Boris. Surnames are unnecessary now.
And today is Election Day! And the result is too close to call. Indeed, it may be an election not so much about candidates but polling companies — online pollster YouGov giving Boris consistent leads while dead-tree press pollsters make it a much closer fight with Ken. There'll be blood on the questionnaires come morning.
Boris has charged his opponents with hacking his website, push polling, lying about his attitude to the Koran and about abolishing free over-60s to travel on public transport. Yet Boris' promises to reform the monstrously long and unwieldy "bendy buses" that traverse London hit the skids when he priced it at £8 million — before conceding it might be more like £100 million. In London, it always comes down to transport.
Ken admitted to openly deceiving the British government over the now-successful Olympic bid for 2012. He claimed he didn't care for sport. It was a ruse to trick the government into spending billions to renovate London's East End — an act of deceit he's very proud of. But it makes his protestations over claims no one trusts him seem like the boy who cried urban fox.
Boris has proved very Internet-friendly, as befits a figure of fun. From an acoustic parody of Obama Girl, the YouTube hit "I Think I Fancy You Boris", to the odd attack site, comedy show appearances, children's TV parodies, dream diaries and German tackling, he does seem an amorphous nexus of creative energies.
But he does play into Ken's last-minute advertising lurch. "Don't Vote For a Joke" scream the new posters – "Imagine Boris dealing with London's 40 billion transport budget. Suddenly he's not so funny."
There are already reports of senior Conservative members discussing how to deal with a rogue gaffe-prone Boris if he wins, with further allegations that he will surround himself with shadowy stooges to do the real work and is only using the Mayor of London as a stepping stone to becoming Prime Minister of Great Britain.
Ken hasn't got Madonna's vote. But in an increasingly cynical London, that very fact might win him thousands more. Ken's banking on that cynicism to get Londoners to vote for the devil they know, and not for a guy with a silly haircut.
Next on Indecision Internationale –the results for an election that most other American news sources will lump with the soccer scores.
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That time traveller is a bunghole. Boris For Prez.
Poor Boris. He lost. Someone just time traveled to my blog.
http://sgtpepperpolitics.blogspot.com/
Boris! O Boris… This is magically delicious.
All I needed to know about Boris I learned Comedy Centralgarden.
Then, I did a tad of research. The who, what, why, when, where, kind of stuff real journalists do. Mind you, when I write tad I mean microdot. But, enough for the powerful medium of a blog. We All Live In A Yellow Submarine.
The race is too close to call at this point during the space-time continuum, however, it appears as though Boris (Comedy Central's Village Idiot) will win. Man, am I stoked. So is Comedy Central I imagine.
Talk about Indecision 2008 here? Check out the latest from The Guardian from their "today." I need a flux capacitor.
The latest update from The Guardian can be found, at their site. Or you can see the regurgitated version and comments with me, Doc, and McFly at:http://sgtpepperpolitics.blogspot.com/
We all live in Yellow Submarine. Yellow. Ironic.
2008 Presidential Election Weekly Poll
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votenic, The Only Poll That Matters.
Oh, come on, we all know Darkseid will show up at the last second, destroy all the others, and take over…until he gets bollocked again by Superman, Orion, or Dan DiDio.
Ken's supporters will all show up to vote because of the demographics that he supports. If YOU want Boris to win YOU have to support him properly and GO VOTE!
Settle down bitches. I've done some more research and corresponded with the folks over on the site of Virgin Records U.K. Boris is gonna win. And guess what, it WILL be HYSTERICAL! I'm going to parlay the bet with Colbert. I mean, I'd honestly trust Colbert with our ountry more than any of our "contenders." GO BORIS GO!
Boris does look like he's going to squeak it. A clown running London…
Oddly enough, a few friends of mine from the U.K swear by Boris and conted he will win. Despite a roumour has it he had an affair with a sheep named Michelle.
http://sgtpepperpolitics.blogspot.com/