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October 20 at 2:46PM

Jack Kevorkian Assisting Joe Knollenberg's Campaign Suicide

POSTED BY: Dylan Ris

U.S. Rep. Joe Knollenberg (R-MI) was thought to have a safe path to re-election until the economic meltdown and resurgent candidacy of Democrat Gary Peters put his campaign in peril. But something else has been eating away at Knollenberg's lead, quietly dripping like an I.V. of potassium chloride

The independent candidacy of Jack "Dr. Death" Kevorkian…

Assisted suicide advocate Jack Kevorkian could throw a wrench in a Michigan congressional race even though he is a distant third, observers say.

Kevorkian is running as an independent in Michigan's 9th Congressional District, espouses the Ninth Amendment means government has no right to stop smoking, mandate helmets or seatbelts, ban abortion or homosexual marriages or assisting in a suicide, The Detroit News reported.

Kevorkian is registering at 4% in recent surveys, which might be enough to tilt the balance in a tight race between Knollenberg and Peters. That's according to the amusingly-named pollster Bernie Porn, who also notes that age will be a factor in this election…

"I think age is one thing that may have some impact. (Knollenberg) is four years older than John McCain," Porn said. "When you get into the 70s that influences folks. But it would have be dealt with delicately."

Age isn't just a factor with the voters; it's a factor with Kevorkian. Anyone who's read the news in the past decade knows what "Dr. Death" considers an appropriate fate for people older than John McCain.

Let's just say it doesn't involve sending them to Congress.

  1. Kevorkian is not looking too well himself these days – and being 80 does put him into that rather narrow category of "people older than John McCain."

    (I think that list has about nine people on. Well, ten, but only if you include 'God, the Creator'.)

    by Karrieno October 21st at 10:34AM
  2. I don't know, ya gotta admire the economics of Kevorkian's national health plan. It improves the financial outlook for Social Security, too, without even raising taxes. The guy's a political dreamboat!

    by DaveW October 20th at 10:38PM
  3. Kevorkian, who is Joe Knollenburg? Never heard of him. Why not Joe Biden?

    Sorry. Hope my "jew phone" doesn't ring next year on Yom Kippur on account of Biden.

    Gilbert, Gilbert, I love you. You're one of the greats. Shalom.

    by Athena October 20th at 9:59PM
  4. Some come out born again christians, others embrace Islam. Jack seems to have been made into a Libertarian.

    Another jailhouse conversion.

    by Ol' Whip October 20th at 9:40PM
  5. Dead is so in this time of year.

    by Warm and Fuzzy October 20th at 7:28PM
  6. Unless the race seriously shifts in the next 2 weeks, Knollenberg gets a stay of execution.

    by F. Jefferson October 20th at 5:12PM

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