Franken, Coleman Vote Counting Disrupted by Lizard People
I've always wondered about America's pathetic voter turnout. 60% is not a passing grade, students. But then I realized that voting is really, really hard.
I mean sure, there are bubbles with names like the ones lots of people have filled out in standardized tests, but the problem with elections is they obviously don't give you enough ballots to practice on. And you have to use a pen and no erasing!
As both the Norm Coleman and Al Franken legal teams challenge ballots for the Minnesota Senate race, you realize just how many mistakes people make. There are ballots with identifying marks, write-ins that people didn't bother voting for, votes in pencil, filled-in vote bubbles that were crossed out and a giant NO next to Coleman's name where both Coleman and Franken have been chosen.
In the famous Beltrami County ballot that will be the Hanging Chad of Aught Eight, a reptilian-American wrote-in "Lizard People" for President. Though the voter chose Al Franken for Senate, he/she filled in the write-in line as well for the Lizard People. It was thrown out by the county as an over vote.
Several questions arise: Should the county have accepted the Franken vote? Does the voter consider Al Franken equivalent to the Lizard People? Is Lizard People a collective, or just one person like Cat Power? If elected, will the Lizard People rule benignly or will they control us with their forked-tongue tyranny?




wow this is really sad all he did was put lizard plp on his ballot and he got a segmet on tv plp have serious entertainment issues……wow….
SETTLE DOWN G!!!! THEMS FIGHTIN' WORDS! Look, just because Tre's teeth are falling out because of a nasty heroin problem and just because Mike likes to photograph the little children of Hell's Angels, doesn't mean they won't sound like the ultimate in Heavenly melodies when they return. Plus, they went to my alma mater, got their start in the dorms, and were the best thing to come out of there since John Dewey (and me). I'm fired up for their return. They have a whole slew of songs dedicated to The Lizard. Bite your forked tongue. I like The Doors enough but, The End? Worst song of all time. At least Phish doesn't have that trophy. I miss Jerry and The Dead. Eddies in rehab (but I caught VH with Wolfgang before his hiatus). New music sucks. Phish is coming back and I can flashback to my college daze in the early 90's. Phish's New Year's show for the Millennium was awesome. And, if you ingest plenty of nitrous, it doesn't matter what they sound like. I miss the balloons. Heavy things man.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xAC9DzV-tGs
Apparently the Phish-people haven't spent their entire hiatus working out their vocal harmonies. Pity.
Yeah I come from the Land of Lizards…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W4QwWj9XTbI
THEY'RE BACK!
hey Lizard People, you had your chance with electing Jim Morrison "Lizard King." It's time to admit this was a disaster and return to your nicely radiant rock.
Thank you for making such a fuss about my ballot. It gives me great honor to know that my vote really counts…
I'd like to thank everyone for making such a big stink about my vote. It gives me great honor to be known all over the internet as the "lizard people" voter.
Bill Laimbeer is really pissed the Sleestacks didn't get any votes.