Barack Obama to Swear into Office on Homosexual Atheist's Bible
Well, it seems to be official. Barack Obama will be taking the Oath of Office on January 20, 2009, with his right hand planted firmly on the Bible owned by a man who neither believed in a personal god nor preferred the company of women in the bedroom.
That's right. He somehow managed to score the same Bible on which fellow Illinoisiate Abraham Lincoln was sworn in as president…
"President-elect Obama is deeply honored that the Library of Congress has made the Lincoln Bible available for use during his swearing-in," said Presidential Inaugural Committee Executive Director Emmett Beliveau.
"The President-elect is committed to holding an Inauguration that celebrates America's unity, and the use of this historic Bible will provide a powerful connection to our common past and common heritage."
Such a thumbing of the nose at all the good old fashioned family values on which this country was founded will almost certainly come as a blow to all the decent Americans who were hoping that anti-gay rights Christian Pastor Rick Warren's prayer at the inauguration was a signal to their ranks that he would be continuing the current administration's policy of coddling them.
No such luck. By deliberately choosing the Bible of Abraham Lincoln — a man who, if not an absolute homosexual, certainly had strong homosexual leanings, and who believed in neither the Bible nor a personal god — Obama seems to be giving aid and comfort to the enemies of American values.
The day seems to belong to the degenerate heathen sodomites.
Update: Reading through the comments to this post, it occurs to me that yet another tired old stereotype has now been laid to rest…
Liberals are no better at interpreting satire than conservatives are.
Cold, empty, meaningless universe bless America.
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This is a COMEDY CENTRAL blog. It's a joke. A punchline. It's supposed to be mocking and funny.
I cannot believe how many people took this as a serious attack on gays or Abraham Lincoln or Barack Obama.
It's jokes, people. Pull your heads out of each others asses.
Consider what God has done:
Who can straighten what he has made crooked?
Check your references. Just because you heard on the internet that Lincoln was a gay athiest does not mean he was.
Ecclesiastes 7:13.
Wow. Not only are most of these commenters homosexual atheists, they are also communist iraqis. Go back to Russian and/or Iraq!
It's supposed to be mocking and funny…but it simply is not.
to MORE American THAN THE ARTICLE's AUTHOR: I'm a Philadelphia resident, and I think your slurs against the south show you to be a bigoted, elitist retard. Go fuck yourself and don't think you're better than people who live in a different geographical region.
Satire? Just not funny… Epic fail
hi
i think that was an appropriate comment for this post.
Comedy central: when truth, lies, sarcasm, and jokes merge into one. Mixed messages rule the internet because it' morphs into one of it's many forms.
LOL – nope…this was d@mn funny
I don't get it. What is this mocking exactly?