Republicans Go Online to Escape Crushing Loneliness IRL

Today the beleagured Republican National Committee elects its new chairman, so last night GOP leaders gathered for a little group therapy…

The party’s outlook is grim, Kentucky Sen. Mitch McConnell implored, as he rolled off figure after figure of demographic groups Republicans lost badly in 2008, particularly blacks and Hispanics.

He lamented that the party is increasingly becoming a "regional party."

"That’s called a minority party," the Senate Minority Leader said, "and I didn’t sign up to be in the minority party."

Chairman hopeful Mike Duncan, for one, is confident the GOP can chip its way out of this lily-white sand trap…

Duncan defended the RNC, saying it has "50,000" on their "social network" (presumably, he means Facebook) — more than the Democrats, he contended.

Almost immediately after Duncan finished trying to convince the members of the party’s hip, social networking prowess, the lights in the room went out. The Republicans, literally, were in the dark.

It's funny because it's true! Know what else is true? Here's the RNC on Facebook: 52,991 members. DNC on Facebook: 35,197 members.

So when we start choosing our government by tallying Facebook popularity instead of votes, which should be any day now, the Republicans can stop pretending to care about blacks, Hispanics, women, Jews, Arab Americans, poor people, residents of New Orleans, etc., and get to work on issues that really matter to their constituents.

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