GOP Watches in Horror as Stimulus Package Lurches to Life

Time's running out for Republicans to go on TV and wring their hands over the economic stimulus plan: it's expected to squeak through a Senate vote early this week, then proceed to final negotiations with the House before collapsing, bloody and scarred, on President Obama's desk.
Sen. Richard Shelby (R.-Ala.), would you like to open the whine this morning?
Leading Republicans warned Sunday that the Obama administration's $800 billion-plus economic stimulus effort will lead to what one called a "financial disaster."
"Everybody on the street in America understands that," said Sen. Richard Shelby, the ranking Republican on the Senate Banking Committee. "This is not the right road to go. We'll pay dearly."
It will lead to a financial disaster, you see, because up until now the fundamentals of our economy have been — what's the word? Oh yes, strong. And that reminds me of somebody else…
"I know we're in trouble. I know America needs a stimulus. We need tax cuts. We need to spend money on infrastructure and on other programs that will immediately put people to work. But this is not it," Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.) said on CBS's "Face the Nation."
"You need to get it right. You don't want to spend these precious taxpayer dollars in the wrong way," Sen. John Ensign (R-Nev.) said on NBC's "Meet the Press."
Heavens, no! Because every time a precious, precious taxpayer dollar is squandered on ballooning initiatives that don't directly improve the lives of hard-working Americans, a Republican sheds a tear.
Which, by the way, is how John McCain filled his swimming pools. Three trillion Republican tears.
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This country is being overthrown by a band of Marcist in Washington and we need to rise up (peacefully) and stop it!!!
I need new light bulbs and free Internet access. I see no reason why this should not be added to the spendulus bill. I also would like a swimming pool for my tears. This is clearly good for the economy since building my swimming pool will put illegals to work digging a big hole in my backyard. The logic is flawless.
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