Deuced Little Coupes: General Motors and Chrysler Request More Bailout Billions

What the… okay, I'm pretty sure this is a lot worse than anyone expected.

Yesterday Chrysler and General Motors submitted their restructuring plans to the federal government, which has already given them $4 billion and $13.4 billion, respectively. Chrysler's all, "Yeah, $5 billion more should do it for us," and the crazy thing about these crazy times is that a $5 billion bailout seems like, so whatever.

Then GM rolls down its window and whistles at Handsome Treasury Elf Timothy Geithner…

GM said in addition to the $2 billion it needs in March and the $13.4 billion it's already received, it would require an additional $2.6 billion in April, along with a replacement for a $4.5-billion line of credit that expires in 2011. It also said it could require another $7.5 billion should the U.S. market remain depressed for a few years.

For those playing along at home, that's $30 billion total. In return for which, General Motors…

…plans to shed 47,000 jobs worldwide this year, close 14 U.S. plants over the next three years, kill four brands and plot a course to become profitable by 2012.

The bright spot in all this, maybe: that busted old Saturn in your yard could finally be worth something.

On eBay.

In 40 years.

When your family is no longer living in it.