Twice before, I've analyzed Obama's body language in order to understand the man's thoughts, once taking a look at Obama's backpacking trip through Europe, and another time, him just traipsing around at home. But this current batch of photos may be the most historical yet. It's been 100 days since Inauguration Day, and everyone knows 100 is easily the most important number at all. Without the number 100, we never would have reached the number 101, meaning there wouldn't have been 101 Dalmations and Glenn Close wouldn't have been able to afford installing solid gold toilets in her beach house.

Anyway, on his 100th Day in Office, Obama flew to Missouri where he delivered a speech so amazing, he just couldn't help himself.

"If my words were a person, this is how I would make sweet, sweet love to them."

Click after the jump to see more of my amazingly accurate analysis of President Barack Obama's body language.

Before the press conference began, Obama set down some ground rules for the White House press corps.

"From now on, you have to be at least this tall to ask me question. No more shorties. I'm looking your way, Helen Thomas."

"When I say 'let's play follow the leader,' it's not a fucking metaphor."

For some weird reason, the following picture reminds me a lot of George W. Bush. I'm sure it's just because Obama is squinting and holding a device often associated with tailgating idiots, but still, it freaks me out nonetheless.

"I swear to God, next stupid thing you say, Biden, I'm blowing this right in your ear until you go deaf."

"Thanks to my administration, these two cuddly teddy bears will no longer be waterboarded."

In the following picture, Obama does his best Larry David impersonation.

"Yeah, that's a preeeeetty preeeeeetty preeeeeeeeetty good hat."

Apparently, Obama found his own press conference last night as interminable as the rest of America did.

"Awww, that's better."

I realize some of you may be wrapping up long days at work so I made this to cheer you up.