5. The Pennsylvania senator endorsing George W. Bush for president in 2000.

4. Specter looking exactly the same while discussing his magic — er, single — bullet theory seven months later.

3. …and looking even more exactly the same while discussing his bout with cancer eight years later.

2. The good statesman takes on the New England Patriots because, like, the integrity of the NFL is the biggest crisis we can think of.

1. Arlen Specter's party switch is bigger news than the Washington Monument and the Pentagon getting it on.