Are you prepared for some disheartening news? Because I've got some disheartening news for you. Get ready to be disheartened…

"In the second term, [Dick Cheney] felt [President George W.] Bush was moving away from him," said a participant in the recent gathering, describing Cheney's reply.

"He said Bush was shackled by the public reaction and the criticism he took. Bush was more malleable to that. The implication was that Bush had gone soft on him, or rather Bush had hardened against Cheney's advice. He'd showed an independence that Cheney didn't see coming. It was clear that Cheney's doctrine was cast-iron strength at all times — never apologize, never explain — and Bush moved toward the conciliatory."

What?! Dick Cheney and George Bush did not see eye-to-eye on the correct way to piss on the Constitution?! That's so sad. Two angry, fearful men who just wanted to soak the founding principles of the nation in their foul-smelling urine, and they couldn't make it work together.

That's really sobering. I mean, those two guys are the very best at being terrible, and if they can't find common ground in country-ruining, then what chance does Barack Obama have in ruining the country? What chance do any of us have in ruining the country?

I guess when I have kids, I won't be able to tell them that when they grow up they can achieve any goal they set their minds to.