• Barack Obama Does Not Have a Bionic Vibrating Penis

    Sorry ladies (and fellas), but your dreams of finally having your country governed over by a half-man/half-machine pleasure-bot complete with a pulsating man-rod will have to wait for at least one more election cycle

    "[Obama] posed for report pictures with the staff when he apparently felt his phone start to vibrate in his pocket on his right thigh — against which one woman was closely pressed.

    "Now that's my phone buzzing there," he said, drawing a laugh. "I don't want you to think I'm getting fresh or anything."

    Hahahahahaha… How very droll, Senator Obama. Aren't you just the living end! Because you were referring to your penis. Your regular flesh and blood penis. But you were pretending like somebody might confuse your vibrating phone for your penis. And now I'm thinking about your penis. What it looks like. What it feels like. What it… uh… you know…

    But, um, yeah… hilarious. Please go on.

    Tags: Barack Obama


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