French Man Accidentally Destroys Barack Obama's Entire Campaign

Barack Obama's speech in Berlin yesterday drew a crowd of 200,000 cheering Germans, who — perhaps for the first time in German history — were truly fired up for a political leader who would greatly affect their lives and for whom they have no actual power to vote.

In his remarks Obama said everything he was expected to say, including "Europe," "wall," "freedom," and the noun that has become a veritable catchphrase for his candidacy ("Templehof").

While many in Europe appreciated the speech, others complained it was too vague on key policy points. That's when one French journalist gave this "helpful" quote to the New York Times…

"On the positive side, we can expect somebody who reasons the way we do in Europe," said Pierre Rousselin, the foreign editor of Le Figaro, a French newspaper, after the speech.

Sacre bleu! Non, non, Monsieur Pierre, you are not helping your ami Barack. To Americans, "reasoning the way we do in Europe" means three things, and three things only: socialism, surrender and political suicide.

The exception, of course, is when we try to learn how it is you do not get fat, despite enjoying baguettes and wine every day. (How do you do it?)