From the Writers of The Daily Show: How McCain Will Get Osama

Overheard in the writers room: In Tuesday night's presidential debate, John McCain made the bold claim that he knew "how to get Osama." A few ways he might do it:

* "Craigslist. I'll put up an ad: W-4-Bin Laden. I'm not a woman, but he doesn't know that. It's foolproof."

* "I'm gonna make him a mix tape! And if that doesn't work, I'll stand outside his cave, holding a boombox over my head, playing a Peter Gabriel song. He won't be able to resist!"

* "Cheese! Terrorists can't resist cheese! Gonna put some in a trap. When he comes out of his little hidey-hole…snap! Break his terrorist neck. And, just in case he's still alive, we'll drown him in a bucket."

* "I'm gonna put a roast beef sandwich in the road, with a sign that says 'sandwich.' Then I'm gonna send away to Acme for a catapult. And if that doesn't work, my rocket-powered roller skates will."

* "I'm gonna dress up as a sexy, female terrorist, hike my skirt up a little bit. And when Osama stops his car — bam! It's already too late.