• Osama bin Laden Offers Welcome Message, Advice for Barack Obama

    Al Qaeda leader Osama bin Laden took time away from his busy schedule of hiding away in the caves of Tora Bora, praying to his god of peace and planning the destruction of thousands of innocent civilians to send incoming U.S. President Barack Obama a congratulatory audio tape.

    Granted, for most of the tape he goes on and on — like he does (you know what I'm talkin' about) — about Israel and Gaza and jihads and blah blah blah. But…

    The al-Qaida leader also vowed that the terror network would open "new fronts" against the United States and its allies beyond Iraq and Afghanistan. He said President-elect Barack Obama has received a "heavy inheritance" from George W. Bush  — two wars and "the collapse of the economy," which he said will render the United States unable to sustain a long fight against the mujahedeen, or holy warriors.

    "There is only one strong way to bring the return of Al-Aqsa and Palestine, and that is jihad in the path of God," bin Laden said in the 22-minute audiotape, referring to the revered Al-Aqsa Mosque in Jerusalem. "The duty is to urge people to jihad and to enlist the youth into jihad brigades."

    Hey, Barack Obama has promised to take advice from everybody and anybody, regardless of party lines. And I think he means it.

    I mean, he did meet for dinner with George Will and Bill Kristol last night. I'd have to imagine that their advice will be about as useful as bin Laden's "kill the infidels" suggestion.

    But it does show that he is listening.

    Tags: al Qaeda, Barack Obama, Gaza, George Will, Israel, Osama bin Laden, William Kristol


About Us

Comedy Central's Indecision is the network's digital hub for news, politics and other jokes: we're here, we're everywhere. We're not affiliated with any television show. We're affiliated with ourselves.