The Great News: Random Picture of a Baby Polar Bear, Pirates Lose and Dreams Come True!

Woman Lives Dream On Live Television! Have you seen the YouTube clip of the mousy woman on British TV who made Simon Cowell's jaw drop? ZOMG, it will make you weep like a freshly mugged girl scout. This woman is a star now. A star! [youtube.com]

Le French Le Capture Le Pirates! Eleven recently captured Somali pirates will now fear berets and little red scarves. The cranky French are getting back in touch with their Colonialist past, and getting tough on high-seas piracy. [reuters.com]

Breathe In, Breathe Out, Get Drunk! While the French are fighting pirates, the Brits are inventing new ways to get hammered. Step into this bar, inhale deeply… because the air is filled with gin mist! It's totally low-calorie, FYI. [metro.co.uk]

Indestructible Man Survives Fall, Twice! Drunk Russian jumps to his death, and lives! Great news! Then the man, fueled by three bottles of vodka, goes back upstairs, and does it all over again… and lives! Miracle or curse? We say miracle! [ananova.com]

Tags: England, France, Great News/Bad News, Pirates