Barack Obama Is Destroying the Economy with Magic to Form His Own Wizardocracy or Something

Finally! A reasoned and thought-provoking explanation for the economy's free fall…

Deep into a New York Times item Monday about rising jobless numbers comes a theory that the Times gently refers to as an "argument" that "may indeed face an uphill fight."

[Republican Congressperson Pete Sessions] told the Times that Obama's plan is to "diminish employment and diminish stock prices." By doing so, Obama "intended to inflict damage and hardship on the free enterprise system, if not to kill it" as part of a "divide and conquer" strategy to consolidate power.

That's super-impressive. Usually, when you hear a theory of such staggering intellective deduction being bandied about, it's coming from a junior high student or a homeless person in need of neurological medication.

The fact that a member of the legislative body of my government came up with that idea all on his own makes me so proud… Words just can't describe the feelings I'm feeling.

Tags: Barack Obama, Economy, House of Representatives, Pete Sessions, Unemployment