• Sarah Palin Declares Independence from Her Job as Governor of Alaska

    When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one bespectacled lady to dissolve the political bands which have connected her with the people of Alaska, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle her, a decent respect to the opinions of (wo)mankind requires that she should declare the causes which impel her to the separation:

    Known as Sarah Barracuda when she played basketball in high school, Ms. Palin used point guard analogy in explaining her decision [to resign as governor], saying she knows “exactly when to pass the ball so the team can win.”

    Also too, she did not add (but we may well imply), that she holds these truths to be self-evident, that all men (and women) are created equal, except for the gays, and that they are endowed by their Creator (Sarah Palin) with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of the Republican nomination for president in 2012, and all the nice designer suits involved with that.

    In Jesus's name, you betcha.

    Tags: Alaska, Christianity, Sarah Palin


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