"How to Take Back America*" Conference Teaches Attendees How to Take Back America*

When I got into the office this morning, I wrote a nice long post about the "How to Take Back America*" conference in St. Louis this past weekend, but WordPress decided to eat it, in much the way that Barack Obama has eaten all of the Bills of Rights and whatnot.

So, anyway, I am not writing that all over again (Too bad for you, because it was an amazing post; take my word for it.) Instead, here's a real quick highlight roundup, on the the off chance that you couldn't make it…

Mike Huckabee recommended sawing off the part of Manhattan that houses the United Nations and pushing it into the sea, because what's with all those non-America countries thinking they get to have opinions about things? I mean seriously…

Oh, and Rep. Trent Franks from Arizona finally let us know who Barack Obama is really trying to destroy: ALL OF HUMANITY!. I gotta say, that's actually a tad more far-reaching of a plan than I thought he'd go for in his first term. But, I guess Yes, We Can and all that, right?

And how could I possibly forget Joe the Plumber winning the coveted Golden Wrench? (That is not even a joke.) However, poor Mr. the Plumber — despite all his honors — still wasn't allowed to change out of his I-just-got-done-painting-the-garage uniform. (I wonder if he'll ever graduate to "real human being.")

All in all, I'd have to say this was the most successful "How to Take Back America*" conference ever. Good job, "How to Take Back America*" conferenceers!

.

^{* …from the minorities.}

Tags: Arizona, Barack Obama, House of Representatives, Joe the Plumber, Mike Huckabee, Missouri, New York, Trent Franks, United Nations