• Scott Brown Goes to Washington, Becomes Most Popular Kid in the Cafeteria

    I can only assume that a properly-caffeinated Fox News copyeditor will change this headline to something less, um, evocative, but let's bask in its glow for now. The point is well taken: Scott Brown went to Capitol Hill, and Republicans are gaga for Scott Brown! Everybody wanted to sit next to him at lunch and be his BFFWISPA (that's "best friends forever while it seems politically advantageous")…

    The [press] scrum was met with all smiles from Senate Republican leader Mitch McConnell, R-Ky., who sat next to a glowing Brown after a 30-minute meeting.

    "I'll always refer to him as 41," McConnell said with a grin, referring to the number of seats Republicans now hold in the Senate, enough to mount a successful filibuster if they all stick together.

    Aww, lookit that, aren't they sweet? "My buddy, my buddy, wherever I filibuster he filibusters / My buddy and me."

    Republican Sen. Susan Collins of Maine was thrilled to see "a fellow New Englander," saying, "Oh, look, I'm going to be the first to greet him" as Brown was escorted by McConnell into a private lunch with Republicans.

    After he strolled out, Brown called the lunch "fun."

    "I enjoyed meeting everyone, even you," he said to the press members. "The spaghetti was good. I could have had more helpings. I was famished."

    Can't blame the man for being hungry. Absorbing wild-eyed adoration burns a ton of calories — how do you think Barack Obama stayed so trim on the campaign trail?

    Luckily Mitch McConnell and Susan Collins were standing by to feed Brown the grapes they'd peeled.

    Tags: Fox, Mitch McConnell, Republicans, Scott Brown, Senate, Susan Collins, Washington DC


About Us

Comedy Central's Indecision is the network's digital hub for news, politics and other jokes: we're here, we're everywhere. We're not affiliated with any television show. We're affiliated with ourselves.