Poor, poor Melissa Hart. When the former representative of Pennsylvania's 4th district lost her seat to Rep. Jason Altmire in the '06 midterms, the terms of her Faustian bargain with Mephistopheles, Chairman of Lobbyists were complete, and thus she was snatched bodily from Capitol Hill and dragged screaming and thrashing into the deepest, darkest realms of K Street before she was even able to reclaim her Volkswagen Jetta from the congressional parking garage…
There it sits, a sad and harrowing reminder of what awaits all congresspeople who trifle lightly with dark powers beyond their control, the etchings of her former colleagues on its dust-caked veneer — "F-ing wash me!," "I wish my wife was this dirty," "Drill here" — belying the unsettling pang it roils in the pit of their stomachs.
And Hart? What has become of her? She is merely a shade, a transient lobbyist spirit drifting from one congressional desk to the next, always offering money for votes at the behest of her unholy Lord of Kickbacks.
Tags: House of Representatives, Jason Altmire, Lobbyists, Washington DC