Mr. and Mr. Gay Marriage Goes to Washington

Just look at these happy, loving couples finally getting the opportunity to join their lives together in the eyes of the law, will you? Turns your stomach, doesn't it? Gay people, pretending like they're real people. Ugh!

You tell me what kind of a loving God wouldn't take offense at this kind of joyous display of human affection. Certainly not a Catholic God, as evidenced by this video…

Way to make a stand, Catholic Church! If gay people are allowed to not be treated like half-citizens, then no one gets health care! Everybody can just get sick and die from all the sinful pestilence that will be stirred up into the air, for all you care. I totally remember that part from the Bible. (It was right near the part with the unicorn, I think.)

Speaking of which, you know all the recent seismic activity lately? Turns out that those are all preemptive strikes against this abomination by the Lord…

"The lava under this Earth's crust is busting loose all over this place," [Westboro Baptist Church] member Tim Phelps told Fox News. "This nation is going to be utterly destroyed and it's going to be with fire."

Scientists!

Tags: Catholic Church, Christianity, Health Care, LGBT, Marriage Equality, Religion, Washington DC, Westboro Baptist Church