• Abraham Lincoln vs. The Bears

    Okay, so this doesn't have quite the zing of yesterday's best t-shirt ever in the world, but this slightly less-perfect t-shirt still manages to say something quite profound about America, I think…

    Some background for those of you who slept through history class…

    Born of a tryst between a beggar woman and Thor, Lincoln grew up in the wilds of Indiana and Illinois. As a boy he was unaware of his fantastic heritage, but the only thing he was ever aware of was the insatiable bloodlust coursing through every vein, muscle, and fibrous sinew of his being.

    He traveled the country, killing any man who dared stand in his way and feasting on the burning remains of any town that opposed him. Upon finding man an unsuitable opponent to fully exert himself, Lincoln began turning his sights to bears, which he wrestled; eagles, which he leapt up and snatched from the sky, and alligators, which he would drown.

    To this day, people still believe that John Wilkes Booth acted alone. You'd think these people knew nothing of bears legendary ability to hold grudges and their innate proclivity for seditious conspiracies.

    (via The Daily What)

    Tags: Abraham Lincoln, Animals, Fashion


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