• Iowa Says No Way to Gay-Lovin' Judges

    If you want to rise to the lofty position of being a Supreme Court justice in the great state of Iowa, you'd better hide your gay friends in the attic and your PFLAG anal beads in the basement, because Iowans are not fucking having ANY of your faery-loving bullshit.

    In a move that sent shockwaves through the Iowa Writers Workshop, a conservative campaign led to the removal of Marsha K. Ternus, the chief justice; Michael J. Streit; and David L. Baker. But what did these judicially-inclined humans do to deserve such a harsh rebuke?

    First, let us go back in boring time to review this boring state's boring history…

    From its first decision in 1839, the Iowa Supreme Court demonstrated a willingness to push ahead of public opinion on matters of minority rights, ruling against slavery, school segregation and discrimination decades before the national mood shifted toward racial equality.

    That legacy was cited in liberal corners here last year when the seven-member court voted unanimously to strike down a law defining marriage as between a man and a woman, making the state the first in the Midwest to permit same-sex marriage.

    That's adorable, but also follows the typically confused Librul Rhetorik of conflating gay rights with black-people rights. This sort of argument never works with right-wingerz and even with some moderates, because they see being geigh as a chosen (bad) behavior or some sort of pitiable inborn disability to be overcome, whereas the blacks just can't help being black. (It does not help that some of said blacks are grossed out by gays who want to co-opt the language of the civil rights movement, but evs, Iowa has no black people so that is another discussion for another place, like Detroit.)

    Aaaaaaaanyway, three of the Homo-Lovin' Seven were tossed out on their tender asses after a statewide campaign by conservatives. The other four weren't on the ballot, which is too bad because, like, wouldn't it be fun just to send an even more powerfully hateful message to the People of Iowa? So now gay teenagers in Iowa who pay attention to these sorts of things have even more confirmation that they are unwanted and unloved. That's a great message to send, and conservatives love to send it. Hooray!

    Tags: Iowa, LGBT, Marriage Equality, Midterms


About Us

Comedy Central's Indecision is the network's digital hub for news, politics and other jokes: we're here, we're everywhere. We're not affiliated with any television show. We're affiliated with ourselves.