• Susan Collins Calls Cops on 9/11 First Responders Lest She Have to See Them

    The bad thing about being a 9/11 first responder is that, thanks to Republicans, no health benefits will be forthcoming as some small means of compensation for the immeasurable good they did for the country on nine years ago.

    The good news though is that, thanks to Republicans, when they arrive in D.C. they get themselves a police escort. Of sorts

    Republican senators were so worried about meeting with 9/11 responders who came here Thursday that at least one called the cops on them, the Daily News has learned.

    Even before the nine responders had a chance to start visiting senators' offices – where they intended to stay until meeting with lawmakers – they were greeted by Capitol Police, who had been called by Sen. Susan Collins (R-Me.)…

    "I'm deeply disappointed in Sen. Collins for calling the Capitol Police, but they welcomed us with open arms," said [9/11 advocate John] Feal, although he wound up with a police escort for the first stops on his visit. "I'm more disappointed that Susan Collins is hiding behind ideology, and now the police, to stop from helping us. And the people she called to stop us are just like us. It's a little ironic."

    Get out of here, you lousy first responders! If you didn't want chronic respiratory, you should have bravely dove head first into a mountain of smoldering rubble with no concern but to save the lives of innocent victims of a deplorable act of international terrorism!

    What? All of a sudden a selfless and heroic lack of personal regard is too good for you? Who needs you (anymore)?


    Tags: 9/11, First Responders, Health, Health Care, Senate

comments

About Us

Comedy Central's Indecision is the network's digital hub for news, politics and other jokes: we're here, we're everywhere. We're not affiliated with any television show. We're affiliated with ourselves.