From the Pork Barrel: Attention Must Be Paid!

* It's been at least 45 minutes! Why is nobody paying attention to Sarah Palin?!?!

* Barack and Michelle Obama save $100 million via Bush Tax Cuts, despite fact that they're not right kind of millionaires.

* Majority of country now trying to destroy sanctity of marriage.

* Republican voters unhappy with depressing choice of ridiculous candidates for some reason.

* Alan Keyes warns God coming to destroying America any time now… any time now… Very soon! What time do you have? I think my watch might be fast.

Tags: Alan Keyes, Barack Obama, David Barton, Internet, Marriage Equality, Michelle Obama, Money, Net Neutrality, Polls, Pork Barrel, Primaries, Religion, Republicans, Sarah Palin, Taxes, Tea Party