• Meet Christine Lagarde, Your IMF Prom Queen

    Congratulations, Humans of the World! According to a Wednesday press conference in some fancypants foreign country, the International Monetary Fund's presumptive Prom Queen is noted French lady Christine Lagarde. But not everybody is as psyched as she is about her future role as the high priestess of Teh Moniez (TM).

    Because we are America's greatest journalists, we've already covered the rising clamor among developing nations dissatisfied with Europe's perpetual leadership of the IMF. Now let's hear Chrissy's response

    Declaring her candidacy at a news conference that was called only the night before, Ms. Lagarde said that being European should not disqualify her, and that it might be an advantage since Europe's sovereign debt crisis is the biggest problem facing the fund. She said she would travel over the next few weeks to listen to and seek support from other I.M.F. members.

    "Being a European shouldn't necessarily be a plus, but it shouldn’t be a minus, either," she said. European leaders have also pointed to the Continent's debt problems as a reason to keep a European at the helm.

    Of course, one might argue that problems other than Europe's sovereign debt crisis might qualify as a bigger deal, like all the malnourished, dying children with distended bellies in developing countries. But that would require the International Monetary Fund to care about poor people, which is never going to happen.

    So, Christine will triumph, and those kids will die of starvation, and the status quo will remain the same. Better luck next life, soon-to-be dead kids! And enjoy your presumed assumption to the throne, Christine. Our #1 piece of advice for the new job: Don't rape any hotel maids.

    Photo by Bertrand Langlois/AFP/Getty Images

    Tags: France, International Affairs, Money


About Us

Comedy Central's Indecision is the network's digital hub for news, politics and other jokes: we're here, we're everywhere. We're not affiliated with any television show. We're affiliated with ourselves.