• Barack Obama Ignores Libya for Sexytime

    While Real American Patriots were busy praying for the success of our NATO-funded Libyan brethren, our heathen Kenyan dictator-for-life was on an exotic island populated by mollusk-chomping white subhumans (i.e., liberals.)

    What manner of inconceivable evil did our sloth-in-chief get up to this weekend?

    But as much as his Republican opponents would like to begrudge him a vacation, the president golfed twice, took his girls to the beach and spent an evening with his wife at the romantic Beach Plum Inn overlooking the fishing village of Menemsha. And that was all just in the first weekend.

    Obama has also found time for socializing… Obama and White House advisor Valerie Jarrett headed to the beachfront home of Comcast CEO Brian Roberts, which overlooks Vineyard Sound… President Obama and Michelle Obama headed to the home where Jarrett is staying for what a spokesman described as a dinner with friends…the president and Jarrett also ventured out for a party with about 100 people at the home of Harvard Professor Charles Ogletree in Oak Bluffs.

    If Barack Obama loves his filthy Massachusetts paradise so much, he should just get a job on a fishing boat already. While the rest of America cried over Libya and engaged in the emotional eating of fried butter, Obama usurped the sacred sport of white Republicans, shamelessly showed off his rippling biceps on the beach, partied down with Harvard nerds, and took his lady on a sex date.

    Meanwhile, the GOP solved our debt crisis, created democracy in Libya, and taught the world the true meaning of love. This weekend made it clear who should be the next President of the United States of America: everyone in the Republican Party, at once.

    Photo by Pool/Getty Images News/Getty Images

    Tags: Barack Obama, Libya, Martha's Vineyard, Massachusetts, Michelle Obama, Republicans, Vacation, Valerie Jarrett


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