9:55 – That's it for me. Gotta go find a prisoner to righteously execute. Let us know your thoughts on tonight's debate in the comments.
9:53 – @daveweigel: "To recap: Scientists: Maybe wrong. Texas judges: ALWAYS RIGHT. STOP HATING FREEDOM. #reagandebate"
9:49 – Oh my God! It's over already?! But they didn't even decide which candidate gets to spoon with the mummified body of Ronald Reagan yet. I need to know!
9:48 – Ron Paul: "Never assume that just because we don't care about poor people, it means that we're not compassionate."
9:46 – @UncleDynamite: "The dream of every American watching this debate is to join the 47% who don't pay taxes."
9:45 – Eliminating the capital gains tax might help the middle class, if the middle class paid much in the way of capital gains tax.
9:44 – Rick Perry makes executing prisoners sound so sexy! I think I'd like to execute a prisoner with my wife tonight. Do they come in banana flavor?
9:43 – Executing prisoners gets an automatic ovation?!
9:41 – Newt Gingrich paraphrased: "I would like to use the rest of my time to go back to fighting with the moderators of the last debate."
9:40 – The GOP will always have the advantage, because Republican voters reward stupidity.
9:38 – Glad Perry is man enough to defend the 3% of scientists who still aren't convinced by the evidence for climate change.
9:36 – Bad move, Huntsman. Defending science in that room is about as popular as defending Jane Fonda.
9:34 – You have to understand when Rick Santorum talks about the Wicked Witch of the West, he thinks she actually existed.
9:32 - @fredkarger: "Leave it to MSNBC and Politico to not bring up social issues. How wonderful! #ReaganDebate"
9:29 – Rick Perry gives Barack Obama props for killing somebody. Nice to see you can find a good side to anybody.
9:26 – I'm so glad that Michele Bachmann pointed out that Ronald Reagan — who raised taxes eleven times during his eight years as president — would also promise not to raise taxes this year. He must have told her via Quija board.
8:24 – Why won't Jon Huntsman make a pledge?! Never mind. Who cares about Jon Huntsman.
9:23 – Mitt Romney paraphrased: "I'm not in the Tea Party."
9:22 – I'm feeling a little melty-brained. How are you guys doing? Just twenty minutes left.
9:21 – @pareene: "The fence is there to keep us IN! Rick Perry supports giving SOYLENT GREEN to innocent girls!"
9:19 – Ron Paul thinks the fence was designed to keep us in! Aaaaaaahhhhh!!! We're trapped!!! I've got claustrophobia! I can't handle this!
9:17 – @TheInDecider: "Newt Gingrich has been reading Ronald Reagan's diary. Sniffing his panties, too. #ReaganDebate"
8:16 – Herman Cain: "Let's solve all of the problems." Good idea! Make this guy president yesterday!
8:15 – Why are "the American people" always talking to Michele Bachmann? Don't they have their own friends?
9:14 – @lianamaeby: "You guys watching that World's Worst Person pageant on MSNBC?"
9:13 – Rick Santorum is Italian?!?! I'm sorry, everybody. We really screwed up on that one.
9:12 – Make English the official language of government?! Fuck that! Let's make American the official language of government!
9:11 – 9:11! Everybody drinks!
9:10 – Fuckin' magnets…
9:09 – Public education is funding $537 less per student in Texas than it was four years ago.
9:08 – A Mexican on stage! Somebody deport him quick!
9:07 – You know what? I'm kinda looking forward to hating President Perry. I think that's gonna be a really cathartic experience.
9:06 – Why should a Texan child need a decent education? Look at how far Perry has gone.
9:04 – Finally! Somebody said "9/11"! Everybody drinks!
9:01 – @TheInDecider: "Dr. Paul, show us on the doll where the TSA agent touched you. #ReaganDebate"
8:59 – Newt Gingrich paraphrased: "I want to say words, so I'm gonna jump in right here."
8:57 – Rick Santorum should only get to say every third word until he starts polling above .02%.
8:53 – Sure, let's switch our retirement system to the Chilean model. Then we'll have a whole new thing to question in a few years.
8:52 – Why is Herman Cain bring up Chile? I heard a rumor that that country is teeming with foreigners.
8:49 – Oh, I see what you're up to MSNBC/Politico. Trying to incite Republican on Republican violence. In the immortal words of Newt Gingrich, "Can't we all just get along?"
8:46 – Rick perry paraphrased: "Excuse me while I dance a mambo around your Social Security question."
8:45 – I'm really digging this Reagan fetish video! I hope they give us a few minutes to clean ourselves up and toss out our tissues when it's over.
8:40 – Rick Perry accused Ron Paul of blaspheming Reagan! That's enough to get a guy burnt at the stake.
8:38 – Ron Paul: "I can get you a gallon of gasoline for a dime." And I can also get you a slightly broken rocking chair for quarter. I got it right in the back of my truck. Do you need a half-full bucket of yellow paint?
8:36 – Haha! Teleprompter…
8:33 – Don't you get the impression when Michele Bachmann talks that she's directing her comments to a giant rabbit in a top hat just about ten feet in front of her?
8:32 – Rick Perry paraphrased: "Let me just answer some other question that nobody asked me."
8:30 – How dare MSNBC question Rick Santorum's record with poverty?! Rick Santorum loves poor people! That's why he worked so hard to make so many of them.
8:27 – Newt Gingrich hates hates hates seeing Republicans fight each other. In fact, he doesn't even like the idea of them debating each other. Why do they even have to talk to each other? When Gingrich is President all Republicans will have their mouths sewn shut!
8:26 – Oh, good! Here's the Newt Gingrich we've all come to accept breathes the same air as us.
8:25 – The candidates paraphrased: "I would totally repeal Obamacare." "Well, I would really repeal Obamacare." "I'd repeal the living fuck out of Obamacare!" "I don't even know what you're talking about; I already repealed Obamacare… inside my brain!"
8:22 – When will Mitt Romney admit the shameful fact that 98% of Massachusetts residents have health insurance? For shame, Mr. Romney. For shame…
8:21 – I love listening to Mitt Romney talk about why Obamacare is different from Romneycare. If someone would just put a decent beat behind it and maybe, like, an 808 synth over it, I would totally fingerbang a sad emo girl to it.
8:20 – The machines are protecting Mitt Romney from having to confront things he's said in the past. They're protecting their own!
8:18 – I'm not sure how I feel about Newt Gingrich deciding to abandon his "fist fight the moderator" strategy from last debate. I really think that worked for him.
8:16 – Brian Williams paraphrased: "Ron Paul, you're a crazy nutbag. Say something funny for our cameras."
8:14 – Look at the size of that flag lapel pin on Michele Bachmann. That's how much she fucking loves America! Enough to wear a surf board on her coat.
8:12 – Huntsman flew in a plane with Reagan. Why didn't he say that earlier? Why are we even debating this primary thing?
8:11 – I'm not sure I get Herman Cain's obsession with the number 9. It really didn't do a very well for Giuliani four years ago.
8:09 – Rick Santorum's still here? What do you have to drop into negative digits to get turned away from these things?
8:08 – Hahahaha! He said "Al Gore." Then the other guy said "Michael Dukakis." Hilarious!
8:07 – Mitt Romney "lived in" the economy? Is that like living inside the Matrix?
8:06 – Turns out Texas is number one! In minimum wage jobs, that is.
8:04 – Never mind. False alarm. Brian Williams will let Perry say whatever he wants. Carry on, America.
8:03 - Uh oh. Brian Williams is questioning Rick Perry's make-believe facts? Can he do that? I mean, isn't he a journalist?
8:00 - Rick Perry's first debate! Eeeeek!!! I have chills! Do you have chills? Maybe I just have avian influenza.
Tags: California, Debates, Herman Cain, Jon Huntsman, Liveblog, Michele Bachmann, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Primaries, Republicans, Rick Perry, Ron Paul, Ronald Reagan