• Rod Blagojevich Sentenced to 14 Years in Federal Prison

    Rod Blagojevich — who earlier today admitted his own guilt in a burlap sack full of federal charges levied against him — was just handed a sentence that is pretty much the polar opposite of "fuckin' golden"

    Disgraced former Gov. Rod Blagojevich was sentenced Wednesday to 14 years in prison after he made a final plea for leniency, acknowledging his guilt and saying, “I am unbelievably sorry.”

    “I believe he did, in fact, accept [responsibility],” U.S. District Judge James Zagel said in announcing how long Blagojevich should spend in prison after being convicted of 18 corruption charges that included attempting to sell or trade an appointment to fill the U.S. Senate seat left vacant by the election of President Barack Obama.

    Well, you know how these things go. Especially with reality TV stars. 14 years. That'll probably get bumped down to seven or eight months.

    Blagojevich will have to surrender Feb. 16. Under federal sentencing rules, Blagojevich will have to serve 85 percent of his sentence, or just under 12 years in prison, at a minimum. The ex-governor turns 55 on Saturday.

    Oooooohhhhh… Maybe that's why he was always telling people that he was innocent. That makes a lot more sense than my old theory, which was that he is a transdimensional manifestation of a quantum being who exists outside of fixed reality.

    Though, I still think that's a likely possibility.

    Photo by Tasos Katopodis/Getty Images News/Getty Images

    Tags: Crime, Illinois, Rod Blagojevich, Senate


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