• Ron Paul Now Favored to Win in Iowa

    Rick Santorum is, at this very moment, balled up in the fetal position on a bathroom floor somewhere along the campaign trail in Iowa, muttering over and over to himself, mantra-like, "I'm next… I'm next… I'm next…"

    The [new Public Policy Polling survey of Iowa GOP voters] has Mr. Gingrich with 14 percent of the vote, down from 22 percent in the same poll one week earlier and continuing a streak of declining numbers for Mr. Gingrich in state and national surveys. Mitt Romney’s support improved to 20 percent from 16 percent in the previous Public Policy Polling survey. But it was Mr. Paul, at 23 percent in the poll, who held the lead. Mr. Paul thus becomes the sixth candidate to have led an Iowa caucus poll at some point this cycle, joining Mr. Romney, Mr. Gingrich, Michele Bachmann, Rick Perry and Herman Cain.

    Mr. Paul also leads our forecast. The model gives him a 44 percent chance of winning Iowa based on the current standing of the candidates and the historic uncertainty of polling-based forecasts. Mr. Romney has a 32 percent chance of winning, while Mr. Gingrich’s chances have crashed to 15 percent.

    Waiting in lane for a coffee at a Starbucks in Iowa must be an excruciatingly frustrating experience. can you even imagine? "I'll have a grande Gingerbread Latte. No, wait, make that a venti soy Peppermint Mocha. Hold on! I didn't know you had smoothies. make it a tall decaf orange mango smoothie. What's that? There's no caffeine in a orange mango smoothie to begin with? Hmmmmm… Better make it a grande Caffè Misto wit extra caffeine. Are these vanilla bean scones? Can I get that in liquid form? In that case just make it a chicken and basil sandwich decaf. Oh and, by the way, did you know that Rick Santorum is curled up on your bathroom floor?"

    Photo by Justin Sullivan/Getty Images News/Getty Images

    Tags: Iowa, Iowa Caucus, Primaries, Republicans, Rick Santorum, Ron Paul


About Us

Comedy Central's Indecision is the network's digital hub for news, politics and other jokes: we're here, we're everywhere. We're not affiliated with any television show. We're affiliated with ourselves.