As Americans, we move through our lives in a comfortable slumber, mindlessly consuming Hostess cupcakes and iPads until a brave news organization comes along to jolt us out of our stupor. Thank goodness for the gumshoes at Fox News, who are here to warn of the latest left-wing plot to destroy freedom/puppies…
The controversy is over a section in the Girl Scouts’ media guide that advises readers to use sites like snopes.com and MediaMatters to fact-check what they read on the Internet. Because, as Steve Doocy put it on Fox & Friends on Thursday, because MediaMatters is "clearly a lefty blog," telling members to turn to them means the Girl Scouts must secretly be in the tank for the left.*
Glenn Beck's site The Blaze first wrote about the guide on Tuesday, and said that it was pointed out to them by a parent of Sydney Volankski, a fifteen-year old former Girl Scout who left the organization in 2010 when she says she realized the organization has a "clear liberal ideology."
Don't be fooled by those cute little outfits or merit badges. The Girl Scouts aren't just selling you a pack of cookies—they’re selling you a pack of lies, with a light coating of toasted coconut communism. Why do the Girl Scouts teach survival skills? It's clearly an attempt to build some kind of liberal tween militia. Volunteering and "helping" others? Just another strategy to mobilize the working poor and other key Democratic voting blocs.
We need to shield our nation's girls from this dangerous organization and stop them from drinking the Kool-Aid, no matter how well it washes down those Thin Mints.
* We are aware of Media Matters' pedigree. We also wonder if Fox News and Glenn Beck would be quite so upset re: politically-oriented Girl Scout reading material if the politically-oriented material in question was created by, say, Fox News or Glenn Beck.
Photo by Images of Our Lives/Archive Photos/Getty Images
Tags: Children, Conspiracies, Food, Fox News, Glenn Beck