This morning Reuters ran a negative piece on Marco Rubio. There was just one problem. Apparently, many of the facts cited in the article were complete fabrications. Two misstatements were particularly flagrant…
As of this writing [Reuters] has not published (at least on its website) a correction for two of the most egregious and easily verifiable errors — that "Rubio also voted against Sonia Sotomayor" and he "voted against Obama's healthcare overhaul…"
Sotomayor was confirmed in 2009, Obamacare passed in 2010 and Rubio wasn’t sworn into the Senate until 2011.
You really have to question a news organization that can't find enough true terrible things about Marco Rubio.
We figured, if Reuters can get away with it, we should be able to as well. Here are some facts I just made up about Marco Rubio…
1. Marco Rubio once went out on a date with Sonia Sotomayor where he invited her to a threesome with Herman Cain.
2. When he had trouble paying his mortgage, he raised money by moonlighting as mannequin at a Men's Warehouse in Miami Beach.
3. He showed up on his first day of Congress wearing a torn vintage punk shirt that read, "Ronald Reagan is dead."
4. He attempted to pay his $100,000 student loan to University of Miami in the form of novelty The Office bobbleheads.
5. He is nicknamed the Tea Party's "crown prince" not because they love him but because, like most royalty, he is thoroughly inbred.
The weird thing is nobody actually needs to make up facts about Marco Rubio. He makes facts up about himself all the time.
Photo by Alex Wong/Getty Images News/Getty Images
Tags: Barack Obama, Florida, Health Care, Marco Rubio, Senate, Sonia Sotomayor, Supreme Court