• Rick Santorum vs. Meteor of Death: A Comparison

    If Rick Santorum's victories are any indication, Mitt Romney's got a tough row to hoe with far-right conservatives. What's worse, he has no idea what that expression means because he's unfamiliar with physical labor of any kind.

    But it's not just Romney who's facing resistance. Recently, Red State blogger Erik Erickson endorsed a "sweet meteor of death" over any of the current GOP contenders. So I began to wonder, how does Rick Santorum stack up against a massive, flaming rock from space that could end civilization as we know it?

    Sweet Meteor of Death Rick Santorum
    * Would kill all life on Earth indiscriminately. * Rich would stand better chance of surviving presidency than non-rich.
    * No one wants it to hit planet. * One guy wants him to be president.
    * Wouldn't rape people. * Also wouldn't rape people, but then again, wouldn't do anything to help rape victims. Basically the point is, when it comes to helping rape victims, Rick Santorum and a meteor aren't especially different.
    * Didn't take money and land from U.S. veterans and then give it to the Catholic Church. * Umm
    * Would prohibit gay marriage by killing everyone. * Would prohibit gay marriage because it's gross.

    Okay, so sometimes the differences aren't readily apparent. The main thing is to keep the GOP base from finding out about this meteor. The last thing Romney needs is more competition.

    Rick Santorum photo by Whitney Curtis/Getty Images News/Getty Images

    Meteor photo by Handout/Getty Images News/Getty Images


    Tags: Armageddon, Head-to-Head, Primaries, Republicans, Rick Santorum

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