• Barack Obama Orders Immunity for Young Immigrants

    In late 2010, the House of Representatives passed the DREAM Act, so-named because it was always a complete fantasy for a far-reaching piece of legislation to make it past the dysfunctional Senate, where 60 votes are needed to shut off an opposition party filibuster. The bill would have extended conditional legal status for five years to undocumented immigrants who were younger than 16 when they entered the country, have lived in the U.S. for at least five years, and earnedĀ a degree from a U.S. high school.

    Needless to say, the DREAM Act died a quiet death in the Senate andĀ moldered beneath America's Latino-manicured lawns until it was resurrected, today, in the form of an executive order by President Obama…

    Under the administration plan, illegal immigrants will be immune from deportation if they were brought to the United States before they turned 16 and are younger than 30, have been in the country for at least five continuous years, have no criminal history, graduated from a U.S. high school or earned a GED, or served in the military. They also can apply for a work permit that will be good for two years with no limits on how many times it can be renewed. The officials who described the plan spoke on the condition of anonymity to discuss it in advance of the official announcement.

    Unlike a legislative solution, this action offers no path to citizenship — it's neither amnesty nor legalization, but merely a semi-permanent stay of deportation — but it still represents good news for friends of Jesus.

    Firstly, because there are few things more unChristian than deporting young people to countries they may not even remember. Secondly, because Jesus has positively working his ass off, getting a GED, joining the military, and trying to start his own restaurant, despite a lack of documentation, and why would we ever want to be rid of this cool guy?

    Photo by Alex Wong/Getty Images News/Getty Images

    Tags: Barack Obama, Dream Act, Hispanic, Immigration, Latino


About Us

Comedy Central's Indecision is the network's digital hub for news, politics and other jokes: we're here, we're everywhere. We're not affiliated with any television show. We're affiliated with ourselves.