• Most Americans Will Be Unhappy with SCOTUS Health Care Decision

    Nobody knows what decision the Supreme Court is going to deliver in the historic case of Obamacare Socialism vs. $500 Bottle of Pills. Hell, we don't even know when we're going to get a decision.

    The only thing that we can say with any amount of certainty is that whatever the decision turns out to be, people will hate it

    The public is unlikely to be satisfied with the Supreme Court's upcoming ruling on the 2010 Affordable Care Act — no matter what the Court decides. Whether the Court decides to uphold the entire law, overturn the entire law, or reject the "individual mandate" while allowing the rest of the law to remain in place, fewer than half of Americans say they would be happy with the decision

    But the other widely discussed possibility — that the court could reject the part of the law that requires individuals to have health insurance while keeping the rest – does not satisfy either side. Among Democrats, 35% would be happy with this outcome, while 56% would be unhappy. Republicans, who have consistently opposed the individual mandate, are not much happier: 43% would be happy if the court strips only this provision, while 47% would be unhappy.

    Okay, so: Keeping all of it is no good, keeping none of it is no good, and keeping some of it is no good. The only possible solution at this point is to keep merrhhm of it.

    On the off chance that someone in the media asks for the definition of the word "merrhhm," Chief Justice John Roberts' fallback plan could be to throw down a smoke bomb and climb up a tree, a technique popularized by Warren E. Burger.

    Photo by Tom Williams/CQ-Roll Call Group/Getty Images

    Tags: Conservatives, Health Care, Judiciary, Liberals, Polls, Supreme Court


About Us

Comedy Central's Indecision is the network's digital hub for news, politics and other jokes: we're here, we're everywhere. We're not affiliated with any television show. We're affiliated with ourselves.