• Good News: Aliens Are Real

    The Roswell UFO incident turned 65-years-young this week. To celebrate the occasion, an ex-CIA agent made it public that the United States government is, in fact, in possession of some little green men and a couple of flying saucers. It may be hard to swallow after years of being lied to, but the American public can rest easy knowing one man will finally reveal the truth

    Chase Brandon, an agent who served 25 years with the agency, said that the information is concealed in a hidden vault within the agency's Langley headquarters.

    "It was in a vaulted area — there was one box that really caught my eye. It had one word on it: Roswell. I rummaged inside it, put the box on the shelf and said, "My God, it really happened."

    There you go. Irrefutable proof from a person with the not at all Jason Bourne-sounding name of Chase Brandon. We can pretty much close the book on this one. But just to satisfy those people who still refuse to believe anything they read on the Internet, let's seal the deal by specifying exactly what it was Brandon saw in that box…

    "Some written material and some photographs, and that's all I will ever say to anybody about the contents of that box," he told the Huffington Post. 

    Darn. We were so close. I'll bet you that after initially talking to the media, Brandon made some additional "discoveries." Like that maybe that the box he found was placed there by his co-worker Blaize Lastely as a prank to get back at him for the time he left that "Ark of the Covenant" in an old government warehouse.

    Photo by Vstock LLC/Getty Images

    Tags: CIA, New Mexico


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