• State Department Denies Hillary Clinton Veep Rumors with Awful Poetry

    With highly-placed Democratic strategists Sarah Palin and John McCain advising President Barack Obama to replace Joe Biden with Hillary Clinton, it was well past time for The Weekly Standard to join in the concern trolling.

    TWS reporter Daniel Halper has been all over this "story," causing State Department spokesman and Hillary Clinton confidant Philippe Reines to send him this missive, dismissing "reports" that Clinton and White House senior adviser Valerie Jarrett met to discuss a VP switcharoo

    "This did not happen
    "They did not have lunch
    "They did not have any meal
    "They did not meet this month
    "They did not meet last month
    "They did not meet in 2012
    "They did not meet in 2011, 2010, 2009
    "This is not happening
    "Truth is that Ed Klein is an idiot with not a shred of credibility
    "Truth is that Ed Klein's motto is 'If at first you don't succeed, lie lie again.'"

    Halper interprets this as Reines channeling "his inner Dr. Seuss," though there's only the vaguest resemblance to Green Eggs and Ham and no evidence suggesting Reines was trying to write anything but free verse. In the same email chain, White House spokesman Tommy Vietor sent Halper a link to this animated video of a man beating a dead horse, which Halper did not initially understand as a reference to his credulous stories about a Clinton vice-presidential nomination.

    In any case, either the State Department press office or The Weekly Standard needs a lesson in what poetry looks like, so here's a limerick that admittedly would not pass muster with Theodor Giesel…

    There once was a man from The Standard
    Joe Biden he frequently slandered
    The reporter's a hack
    but let's cut him some slack
    His readers need to be pandered.

    I'll be on the lookout for my Wallace Stevens award.

    Photo by Sean Gallup/Getty Images News/Getty Images


    Tags: Hillary Clinton, Joe Biden, Media, Veepstakes, Weekly Standard

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