The perennial candidate, we all know what you are. It's newspaper code for candidates with a single-issue platform to take down Christmas lights by the end of January -– especially you, SHARON DOWN THE STREET. You're the old guy who shouts at the empty chair (topical), only you're on our ballots. And even though we see your name at the poll year after year, we know to avoid you like a deviled egg that's been passed around the picnic table a few too many times (topical).
Stan McEtchin is no deviled egg! The 88-year-old has run for Paradise Town Council in Butte County, California for years to draw attention to issues he's interested in, like using sewage system gray water for irrigation. That's a reasonable issue for a guy we all incorrectly assumed to be a little bonkers and full of salmonella.
Despite his sensible stick-to-itiveness, McEtchin received a call from someone in Paradise to step down from the race this year because if he did, there would be an equal number of candidates and open seats, negating the need for an election and saving the town some scratch. But McEtchin said no, because duh, this isn't his first time at the perennial candidate rodeo. McEtchin said he'd consider dropping out for $10,000 because he's a perennial goof and perennially awesome like that.
Yes, he only received 2.8 percent of the vote last time, but to me that just sounds like 97.2 percent of voters are just friends he hasn't met yet.
Not only is McEtchin a WWII vet, he makes salvaged metal sculptures in his front lawn. Just watch the video. How is he not the perennial mayor at this point? "I ain't an artist, I just do artwork," McEtchin said, because this guy is perennially zinging zingers and may have just coined the expression of our time. I ain't a blogger, I just do blogwork.
And no politician is complete without a strong spouse. McEtchin's wife, Eileen "Tugboat Annie" McEtchin told the Chico News & Review, "We just play characters. We like to make life interesting."
That's a quote in a published article about a couple in their 80s. So there you go, that's what Paradise looks like.
Photo by Panoramic Images/Panoramic Images/Getty Images
Previously: Kirk Caldwell, "Honolulu choo choo"
Our friends at Dr Pepper are going to send Mr. McEtchin a one-of-a-kind t-shirt, and you get to choose its slogan:
Want a custom t-shirt of your own? Of course you do! Head to DrPepper.com and get started.
Tags: California, One of a Kind Candidates