Though the battle of the Chick-fil-A sandwich has abated, our food wars continue. Ever since Barack Obama received an unexpected boost from a pizzeria owner — whom news outlets breathlessly described as a 6'3", 260-pound behemoth because they're unaware of the difference between a bear hug and a mauling — the pizzeria has been the subject of boycotts and trolling Yelp battles.
It's bad news for Americans who believe politics should stop at the drive-thru's edge, good news for connoisseurs of Internet commentary…
Toledo, OH: "Seriously? You didn't build it, so you should be out of business!"
Las Vegas, NV: "I will not eat from traitor's hands and I'll never take food from man who DIDN'T BUILD his business."
Los Angeles, CA: "Most of yall Democrats can't afford to eat at this restaurant anyway. This restaurant doesn't accept food stamps."
Most reviews of Big Apple Pizza are pretty positive. The cheese doesn't taste like socialism, explains a reviewer from San Diego…
Pizza and Hugs = Freedom!!!
Therefore by the transitive property, if you don't like pizza and hugs, you HATE freedom.
To recap, we've now had President Obama bring down Reddit with an Ask Me Anything post and Yelp reviews have become a proxy battle between partisans. By 2020, I expect we'll abolish Congress and just tackle our policy debates in a Fark thread.
Photo by Saul Loeb/AFP/Getty Images
Tags: Barack Obama, Florida, Food, Internet