The Mitt Romney campaign is not the only operation that has experienced a "reset" in recent days: The much-awaited iPhone 5 hit Apple's shelves early this morning. Reviews have been mixed, with many commenting that the new version is much like the old, just repackaged in a more colorful container.
The new version of what, you ask? That's often hard to discern, since the main difference between Romney and an iPhone is the latter's paucity of plastic. Despite this, editors and writers often attribute human pronouns to Romney, so for the purposes of this challenge, all identifiers have been changed to PRODUCT and personal pronouns replaced with IT.
First, The Reviews of the iPhone 5 and Mitt Romney
1. "What's striking about PRODUCT is what's missing: a compelling story about what distinguishes IT from ITS competitors."
2. "Another bland and boring PRODUCT."
3. "And yet IT is also so, so cruelly boring."
4. "It's a weird paradox. PRODUCT can simultaneously be the best PRODUCT on the market and really, really boring."
And Now, the Headlines
5. How PRODUCT Could Singlehandedly Rescue the U.S. Economy
6. It's More Obvious Than Ever That Only PRODUCT Can Save The US Economy
7. Why It's Good For PRODUCT to Be Boring
8. Boring May Be Just What We Need
Finally, Commentary About the PRODUCT's Advertising.
9. "It is fantastic, in the sense that it manages to encapsulate, in the span of one minute, the entire PRODUCT brand: boring… and slightly dishonest."
10. "PRODUCT is willing to bend the truth to improve brand perception
Answers: Numbers 1, 3-5, 7 and 10 refer to the iPhone, via Timothy B. Lee, Wired, Ibid., Washington Post's Wonkblog, Digital Trends and The Verge, respectively. Numbers 2, 6, 8-9 refer to Romney, via Rick Santorum as quoted in Huffington Post, Business Insider and Gawker, respectively.
Photos by Mario Tama/Getty Images News/Getty Images and Joe Raedle/Getty Images News/Getty Images
Tags: Apple, Mitt Romney, Science & Technology