Gather around, children. It may be the day after Halloween, but the truly scary day is still creeping up toward us in less than a week, so I — Barack Obama, the President of the United States — am going to tell you a true terrifying tale of terroristic proportions that will chill you to the very bone.
It's about an evil man who did an unthinkably evil deed, and so I killed him with my bare hands. Now, he haunts my dreams by illegally contributing to my reelection campaign…
Using a Pakistani Internet Protocol and proxy server, a disposable credit card and a fake address, "Osama bin Laden" has successfully donated twice to Barack Obama’s presidential re-election campaign.
The "Bin Laden" donations, actually made by [WorldNetDaily] staff, included a listed occupation of "deceased terror chief" and a stated employer of "al-Qaida."
Wait a minute. It's not a ghost? But the address given for the donation was: 911 Jihad Way, Abbottabad, CA — oh, OK. I get it now. It's just some conservatives trying to prove my campaign website's verification system needs to be strengthened. Thank goodness. I was really worried there for a moment. What's that you say? Accepting donations from foreign nationals is illegal and I have to give the money back? That's the scariest thing I've ever heard!
Photo by Win McNamee/Staff/Getty Images
Tags: Barack Obama, Osama bin Laden, Republicans, WorldNetDaily