* Obama's second season is some must see TV.
* Abraham Obama looks like a cool dude.
* And you thought General Petraeus had his hands full…
* A lot of moms wish they had enough time to eff a general.
* Only a certain number of states can win the golden ticket!
* This week in Unnecessary Censorship: Petraeus did what?
* BP throws its chump change at the US, shouts "Sorry!" over it's shoulder.
Tags: Barack Obama, BP, David Petraeus, Ohio, The Onion