• 11 Reasons Why America Will Never Be #2

    A new study released by the National Intelligence Council claims that the United States–currently the world's #1 economic superpower–will fall to second place sometime before 2030, and that China will take the top spot.

    National Intelligence Council? More like National Dumb-igence Council. China may have a growing middle class, but the United States has plenty of reasons why it will always be #1, in everything.

    Here are 11 of them:

    11. Toppings

    America is the land of plenty… of toppings. Burger? You get toppings with that. Waffle? You get toppings with that. Fro-yo? You get mad toppings with that. We even put toppings on our Constitution (amendments).

    toppings
    Photo by William Thomas Cain/Getty Images News/Getty Images

    10. Chuck Grassley's Twitter

    9. Eagles

    Look at this m-fer soar.

    Eagle USA USA
    Photo by Adam Jones/Digital Vision/Getty Images

    8. The Corn Palace

    You remember the Corn Palace.

    Corn Palace

    7. Snuggies

    More than a blanket. More than a sweater. Possibly the key to world peace. It's hard to be militant in a Snuggie.

    Snuggies
    Photo by Dana Edelson/NBCUniversal/Getty Images

    6. Beyonce

    Duh.


    Photo by Kevin Mazur/WireImage/Getty Images

    5. Drive-through alcohol

    You want to drink. You also want to drive. The greatest nation on earth has you covered.

    Drinking in car
    Photo by Will & Deni McIntyre/Getty Images

    4. Most people have rights, most of the time

    Good job, us!

    Voters voting
    Photo by Andy Sacks/Stone/Getty Images

    3. Honey Boo Boo

    A plucky little girl from a poor rural town becomes a television superstar, and now has a shot at growing up to be a real housewife. Only in America.

    Honey Boo Boo
    Photo by Noel Vasquez/Getty Images Entertainment/Getty Images

    2. Christmas

    Pretty sure we invented this. We seem to be the only ones waging war for it, year in and year out.

    Christmas tree
    Photo by Siri Stafford/Riser/Getty Images

    1. The world's largest ball of twine

    If this isn't the definition of ingenuity, we don't know what is.

    world's largest ball of twine
    Photo via kansastravel.org


    Tags: Alcohol, China, Christmas, Chuck Grassley, Food, Music, South Dakota, Television, War on Christmas

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