Some of you may remember our Traditional Celebration of New Agriculture Secretary Tom Vilsack. For those of you who do not remember that, click these words.
Today Agriculture Secretary Tom Vilsack turns 62. In the rural hamlet where I was raised, locals always marked the Agriculture Secretary's birthday by gathering in the town square to recite facts about the Agriculture Secretary while gazing at pictures of hedgehogs. Then we ate cake and drowned the witches.
So it is my pleasure to begin this celebration of Tom Vilsack's birthday.
Tom Vilsack says the USDA wouldn't allow manufacturers to use pink slime if it wasn't safe. He should know, right? He's the Agriculture Secretary.
Tom Vilsack was so sorry about that whole Shirley Sherrod thing, you guys.
Tom Vilsack's real middle name is "James." His real first name is "Thomas." He likes to be called "T-dog" (unconfirmed report).
Tom Vilsack thinks rural America is becoming "less and less relevant." He should know, right? He's the Agriculture Secretary.
Tom Vilsack hosted the first-ever "USDA Virtual Office Hours" on Twitter last spring. He did not post any selfies.
Concerned about school lunches? So is Tom Vilsack. But he also believes that "New school meals are designed to meet only a portion of a child's nutritional needs over the course of the school day," so maybe you should bake those cookies after all.
This concludes our traditional celebration of the Agriculture Secretary's birthday. See you over at the dunking pool!
Photos by Wolfgang Kumm/AFP/Getty Images; Universal Images Group/Getty Images; BSIP/Universal Images Group/Getty Images; BSIP/Universal Images Group/Getty Images; NBCUniversal/NBCU PhotoBank/Getty Images; BSIP/Universal Images Group/Getty Images
Tags: Animals, Tom Vilsack