Our Private Sectors Are Shrinking, According to Fox Nation

U.S. GDP shrank for the first time since 2009 during the fourth quarter of 2012, clocking in at negative 0.1 percent.

Most of the decline can attributed to decreases in national defense expenditures, which fell 22.2 percent, even as investment by the private sector increased and real disposable personal income rose by 6.8 percent.

And there's another bit of good news: thanks to Fox Nation, the production of nonsensical dick jokes rose 100% in the first quarter of 2013.