• Herman Cain Will Make a Great Sarah Palin

    Herman Cain

    In a definitive sign that Herman Cain's presidential bid was 100% successful, Fox News has hired the former candidate and Godfather's Pizza CEO as a paid contributor, just weeks after dropping Sarah Palin. Nearly every Fox show could benefit from Cain's political and business insight:

    The Five: A show whose hosts claim algebra is a conspiracy cooked up by Pol Pot could use the mathematical acumen of a pizza salesman. Unfortunately, Cain will not appear on this show until it's renamed "The Nine."

    FOX & Friends: Can Herman Cain chuckle lightheartedly about how the commander-in-chief is a secret Muslim? Perfect.

    Your World w/ Neil Cavuto: As the focus turns to business news, Cain will deliver a fresh perspective on the stock market in 30 minutes or less, or Fox gets its money back.

    FOX Report w/ Shepard Smith: "FOX Report" goes through the day's top stories at the "speed of live," but Cain will speed that up to the "velocity of a Godfather's pizza in college kid's gut."

    Lou Dobbs Tonight: These two agree — we should not be outsourcing jobs to Uzbeki-beki-beki-stan-stan.


    Previously: 5 Funniest Presidential Ads of 2012 [VIDEO]

    Photo by Davis Turner/Getty Images News/Getty Images

    Tags: Fox News, Herman Cain, Media, Sarah Palin


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