• North Carolina Lawmakers Want to Be the State's Only Boobs

    Under a proposed North Carolina law that passed out of the House Judiciary Committee this week, women could spend up to six months in jail for exposing a "nipple, or any portion of the areola, of the human female breast" for the "purpose of arousing or gratifying sexual desire."

    Indecent exposure laws are nothing new — though people who insist that women's nipples are somehow indecorous while manboobs are acceptable for polite society have a twisted sense of decency — but the impetus for this law is unique…

    The measure was requested by Asheville officials after participants in a women's rights rally held a second annual topless protest in a downtown park last summer.

    It's good to know that North Carolina legislators think women's equality is "arousing," but that makes it all the more sad that they're trying to ban this form of protest. To be fair, the adult babies elected to North Carolina's statehouse have given this issue a lot of thought…

    Rep. Annie Mobley, D-Ahoskie, voiced concerns that the bill could affect people wearing "questionable fashions."

    [Republican committee chair Sarah] Stevens said using pasties or other nipple coverings would protect those women against prosecution. "They'd be good to go."

    Rep. Tim Moore, R-Cleveland, quipped, "You know what they say — duct tape fixes everything."

    It's true, duct tape fixes nearly everything. For example, if conservative lawmakers would simply wrap it over their eyes, they wouldn't need to pass dumb laws.

    Photo by Sergei Supinsky/AFP/Getty Images


    Tags: First Amendment, North Carolina, State Legislature, Women's Rights

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