Pauly Shore's Pro-Obama Rap Song Isn't Helping Anyone

In The Wire, Waylon tells Bubbles says one has "to see that bottom coming up at" them before they can get clean. When I saw the Big Bird attack ad a few days ago, I knew it was coming. But I think this is finally it. I think this Pauly Shore rap song about the 2012 election is rock bottom. God, I hope this is rock bottom…

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New Conspiracy Theory: Mitt Romney Cheated in Debate

Conservatives this morning cried conspiracy over jobs report numbers that favored the Obama administration. Typical conservatives: petty, desperate, reactionary and childish, quick to claim the other side cheated whenever a political news cycle does not turn their way.

In completely unrelated news — have you guy's seen the shocking, explosive evidence that proves Mitt Romney cheated in the debate?! I can't believe Mitt Romney cheated in this political news cycle that did not turn my way!

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10 Ways Obama Will Make Up for Missing His 20th Wedding Anniversary

Tonight is the 20th wedding anniversary of President Barack and Michelle Obama. They already celebrated the way most couples do, by having their staff tweet love notes to each other. Unfortunately, their special night falls on the date of the first presidential debate.

Obama is a smooth operator and he's not going to let a little thing like a debate stop Michelle from having the anniversary she deserves. We don't know exactly what he has planned, but here are a few suggestions…

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Allen West's New Ad Is Crazy Like a Fox

You can't deny that Allen West's new ad is incredibly effective and well-made. It's like an episode of 24 in which it's Jack Bauer's mission to make sure a batshit insane man is re-elected to Congress or else the terrorists win…

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ObamaPhone vs. iPhone 5: A Side-by-Side Comparison

You may have heard rumors of the Obama phone if you listen to Rush Limbaugh or, if you are an old person, you may have forwarded an email about it to your grandchildren. Fact checkers have tried to disprove the existence of the Obama phone using facts. But now the world has all the proof it needs. According to this very credible-looking source, "everybody in Cleveland, no minority, got an Obama phone."

We have no reason to doubt her! We already know iPhone users are often big city liberals who, unlike welfare recipients, are prone to standing in long lines. We wondered what else the ObamaPhone had in common with the new iPhone 5…

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