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Ken Ellis
  • Marvel Universe: Colbert for President – Colbert Meets West Coast Luminaries

    After Marvel Comics editor-in-chief Joe Quesada announced that Stephen Colbert is still running for president in the Marvel Universe, we decided to follow up by contacting a reporter in that universe for updates on his campaign:

    marvel-colbert-banner.jpg

    Colbert's Week of "West Coasting"
    Ken Ellis, DB Staff Reporter

    Although the free world grows further consumed by thoughts of a struggling economy, warring nations and alien invasion, Stephen Colbert maintains that rather than become a nation of whiners, things must remain "business as usual." And for the presidential hopeful, business this week includes a whirlwind tour of the "Left Coast."

    Monday saw Secret Service agents accompany the populist as several members from the Commission on Superhuman Affairs (CSA) provided him with a tour of the Thunderbolts Mountain facility in Coyote Springs, Colorado. While there, Colbert spent a few minutes — under heavily armed supervision — speaking with Norman Osborn, former Green Goblin and the CSA's acting director of the Thunderbolts. Although their conversation seemed coolly amicable, Colbert has previously condemned Osborn and his faction of rehabilitating criminals, despite its effectiveness in tracking down potentially dangerous individuals who refuse to enroll themselves in the Superhuman Registration Act. Last month, the presidential hopeful's camp even released a statement of outright censure, asserting that the Thunderbolts are "untrustworthy…a menace waiting for the right time to strike."

    On Tuesday afternoon, Team Colbert flew to San Francisco, new home for the controversial mutant group known as the X-Men. Although he was unable to meet personally with the newest residents of the City by the Bay, Colbert enjoyed his visit to the War Memorial and Performing Arts Center with San Francisco's mayor — known to everyone simply as Sadie. Since personally welcoming the X-Men after they rescued the city from the mutant illusionist called Mastermind, the mayor has generated divisiveness within her own political party — as well as spikes in city tourism and commerce, which during these troubled times is nothing short of impressive.

    Where's next for Colbert? A spokesperson from his team says he'll remain in San Francisco until Thursday. Then, unless he's called away on urgent business, he'll head to San Diego and join the 150,000-plus expected at Comic Con International — though he doesn't plan on too much campaigning while there.

    "Mr. Colbert is a huge comics fan, so he wants to wind down a little and take in the festivities," the spokesperson explained. "And since he didn't find that Sentry comic he was looking for in New York last April, he's hoping his luck will change over the weekend."

    This week's image is from X-Factor #33.

    Previous Colbert easter eggs:

    Eternals #2, Punisher War Journal #21, She-Hulk #30 X-Factor #32, Amazing Spider-Man #562 Secret Invasion #3, Ms. Marvel #27 and She-Hulk #29, Incredible Hercules #117, X-Men: Legacy #211, Young X-Men #2, Amazing Spider-Man #556, She Hulk #28, Incredible Hercules #116, Amazing Spider-Man #556, Secret Invasion #1


    Tags: Ken Ellis, Marvel, Stephen Colbert, The Colbert Report
  • Marvel Universe – Colbert For President: iPhone Skrull Invasion

    After Marvel Comics editor-in-chief Joe Quesada announced that Stephen Colbert is still running for president in the Marvel Universe, we decided to follow up by contacting a reporter in that universe for updates on his campaign:

    marvel-colbert-banner.jpg

    Colbert: Cell Phone Conspiracists Have Wrong Number
    Ken Ellis, DB Staff Reporter

    Conspiracy theorists, reality is calling. It just may take longer to reach some of you on your cellular phone.

    Following last Friday's inauspicious debut of a much-anticipated new mobile phone, in which major software problems hobbled the activation of thousands of devices throughout 24 countries, people dialed up their dissatisfaction on the Internet. But rather than hold the manufacturer culpable, several bloggers blamed it on the alien invasion that has been depicted via amateur video and news footage from New York City, Great Britain and Wakanda.

    On one website, capncommunity.com host Corey C. wrote that the new phones' failure were the byproduct of "alien infiltration of our technology. These creatures put some unknown alien virus into the new phones, which are activated when you go online. Basically, they're using us to spread the virus onto the Internet, which affects just about every facet of our everyday living."

    Another blogger — UKneeVerse — suspects that the recent uprising in Wakanda is somehow connected to the African nation's surplus of vibranium, a metal that absorbs all vibratory (i.e., sound) and kinetic energy in its area. "Those who control the vibranium can control the world," he wrote. "If I were an alien and thought I could cripple man's technology through vibranium, I'd go after it too."

    While attending a private function in Chicago's Harris Theatre last Sunday, presidential candidate Stephen Colbert tried making light of the mobile hang-ups, citing his hope that the unfriendly E.T.'s can soon use the new cellular devices to phone home.

    "Mr. Colbert thinks it's preposterous that people are actually blaming a wireless phone's problems on aliens," confirmed camp spokesperson Tracy Dugan via telephone. "And the idea that they're secretly attempting to harness vibranium … talk about making incredible leaps in logic. If you looked at the footage from Times Square, it's pretty obvious that our extraterrestrial aggressors aren't so subtle in their methods."

    Dugan cut our conversation short after receiving a call from Colbert…on her new mobile phone, no less. "Unless it's an alien with Mr. Colbert's cell number, I think I better take this," she joked before hanging up.

    For a special Colbert easter egg, check out X-Factor 33, on sale now.

    This week's image is from Eternals #2.

    Previous Colbert easter eggs:

    Punisher War Journal #21, She-Hulk #30, X-Factor #32, Amazing Spider-Man #562 Secret Invasion #3, Ms. Marvel #27 and She-Hulk #29, Incredible Hercules #117, X-Men: Legacy #211, Young X-Men #2, Amazing Spider-Man #556, She Hulk #28, Incredible Hercules #116, Amazing Spider-Man #556, Secret Invasion #1


    Tags: Marvel, Stephen Colbert
  • Marvel Universe: Colbert for President – Friends in High Places

    After Marvel Comics editor-in-chief Joe Quesada announced that Stephen Colbert is still running for president in the Marvel Universe, we decided to follow up by contacting a reporter in that universe for updates on his campaign:

    marvel-colbert-banner.jpg

    Power Packing to the Oval Office?
    Ken Ellis, DB Staff Reporter

    Skyrocketing fuel costs, soaring grocery bills, take heed: Stephen Colbert plans to wipe you out if he's elected president this November.

    Naturally, pledges to conquer such economic obstacles are being made by every candidate this election year. However, Colbert's camp claims to have the inside track on making these guarantees realities.

    "Mr. Colbert is maintaining close contact with key people to find solutions to these extremely pressing dilemmas in our national economy," stated spokesperson Katherine Raymond last Monday. "In recent months, he has met with geneticist Henry Pym and S.H.I.E.L.D. Director Anthony Stark about devising technologies that can help in these efforts."

    Just as Colbert has criticized Senator Gordon Wright's recent association with a man claiming to be Captain America, the populist's detractors have continually accused him of tapping "star power" to boost his own numbers in the race to the White House. After all, both Pym and Stark are founding members of Earth's Mightiest Heroes, The Avengers, a team that over the years has dominated front-page headlines.

    "Perhaps one could call Dr. Pym and Director Stark 'celebrities,'" Raymond admitted."“But along with Reed Richards, they're some of the greatest minds on this planet. Dr. Pym's genetic expertise could be pivotal in devising new ways to produce crops in areas that have been devastated by Mother Nature. And before Director Stark ever built rockets into armored boots or took over S.H.I.E.L.D., he was a master at building technologies that, if used properly, can ultimately replace the need for oil.

    "Mr. Colbert is thinking about this country first, not who he should hang out with to become popular," Raymond added. "With everything this world is going through right now, on top of rumors of shape-shifting aliens running around, Mr. Colbert is looking to people that this country can trust in a crisis."

    For a special Colbert easter egg, check out Eternals #2, on sale now.

    This week's image is from Punisher War Journal #21.

    Previous Colbert easter eggs:

    She-Hulk #30, X-Factor #32, Amazing Spider-Man #562 Secret Invasion #3, Ms. Marvel #27 and She-Hulk #29, Incredible Hercules #117, X-Men: Legacy #211, Young X-Men #2, Amazing Spider-Man #556, She Hulk #28, Incredible Hercules #116, Amazing Spider-Man #556, Secret Invasion #1


    Tags: Ken Ellis, Marvel, Stephen Colbert, The Colbert Report
  • Marvel Universe: Colbert for President – Campaign Fireworks

    After Marvel Comics editor-in-chief Joe Quesada announced that Stephen Colbert is still running for president in the Marvel Universe, we decided to follow up by contacting a reporter in that universe for updates on his campaign:

    marvel-colbert-banner.jpg

    Colbert on Wright: "The Man Who Scammed America", or, Farce of July?
    Ken Ellis, DB Staff Reporter

    The Fourth of July holiday weekend is upon us, but the best fireworks this week are emanating from the presidential race, particularly between Stephen Colbert and Senator Gordon Wright.

    On Monday, Colbert released a statement that essentially accused the Third Wing Party leader of staging his own assassination attempt in Chicago last week — an attempt that was thwarted by a man dressed as Captain America, who then addressed the crowd to personally endorse the Senator's platform.

    "Senator Wright's actions are deplorable," said Colbert campaign strategist David Seperson. "He's exploiting the American public's desperate need to believe in a symbol during these troubled times. We find it extremely convenient that Captain America would return from the 'Great Beyond' only days after the polls showed the Senator three points behind Mr. Colbert."

    The incident in Chicago marks the second appearance of Captain America since his own very public assassination months ago. The last time was amid a protest gone awry in Washington, D.C., while Senator Wright happened to be visiting the White House.

    "That Captain America didn't even wear the right costume, and several people claimed he carried a firearm," Seperson stated on behalf of Colbert. "At least they got the details right in Chicago."

    At this time, there has been no reaction to this controversy from the camps of Senators Barack Obama and John McCain. However, Wright spokesperson Brittany Clyde responded in a statement, "If Mr. Colbert has such a problem with Captain America saving Senator Wright, people seriously need to evaluate whether or not he's more concerned for the welfare of this nation, or the fact that the Senator is about to overtake him in the polls."

    "It's despicable," Seperson added. "Wright's P.R. people have been intentionally creating buzz that Captain America may show up to support the Third Wing rally in Minneapolis. What's next? Wright campaign fund-raisers? Politicians' birthday parties for their kids? Disgraceful."

    For a special Colbert easter egg, check out Punisher War Journal #21, on sale today.

    This week's image is from She-Hulk #30.

    Previous Colbert easter eggs:

    X-Factor #32, Amazing Spider-Man #562 Secret Invasion #3, Ms. Marvel #27 and She-Hulk #29, Incredible Hercules #117, X-Men: Legacy #211, Young X-Men #2, Amazing Spider-Man #556, She Hulk #28, Incredible Hercules #116, Amazing Spider-Man #556, Secret Invasion #1


    Tags: Ken Ellis, Marvel, Stephen Colbert, The Colbert Report
  • Marvel Universe: Colbert for President – Border Patrol

    After Marvel Comics editor-in-chief Joe Quesada announced that Stephen Colbert is still running for president in the Marvel Universe, we decided to follow up by contacting a reporter in that universe for updates on his campaign:

    marvel-colbert-banner.jpg

    Otherworlders Put Colbert on Border Patrol
    Ken Ellis, DB Staff Reporter

    The subject of comprehensive immigration reform is a growing presidential predicament these days. But Stephen Colbert believes that the recommendations to secure U.S. borders from "illegal aliens" should apply to those of the extraterrestrial kind as well.

    "Mr. Colbert fully grasps the importance of dealing with those who enter this country illegally," said camp spokesperson Tracy Dugan. "But he believes that we should put into effect laws that will also govern refugees who have traveled from another world, dimension or otherworldly province, not just Mexico or Cuba."

    Colbert may have a point, especially after that alien threat in New York City recently. And it wasn't so long ago that Prince Namor of Atlantis had threatened the wellbeing of "inferior surface-dwellers" that he generally helps defend now. Then there are the likes of Thor, Hercules or the Mighty Avengers' Ares; many critics have argued that these mythical gods walking amongst us only follow our laws until they no longer suit their own purposes.

    That said, how does one tell otherworldly beings to step into line or exit U.S. borders without risk of finding themselves in the maw of a monstrous sea creature, or the smiting end of a hammer called Mjolnir?

    Adam Kirshner, anti-mutant activist and one-time follower of Rev. William Stryker, shares the populist's concerns, even if some of them are addressed by the Superhuman Registration Act. "We needed to extend similar reforms with mutants long ago," Kirshner said Tuesday. "Their unnatural abilities give them reason to believe that they're above man's — or God's — laws. To this day, we're regretting that we never put the leash on that collar when we needed to."

    "Mr. Colbert doesn't know Mr. Kirshner, nor does he share his bigoted vision," Dugan emphatically stated. "Mr. Kirshner is simply a hate-monger who wants to ride on the coattails of a presidential frontrunner."

    For a special Colbert easter egg, check out She-Hulk #30, on sale today.

    This week's image is from X-Factor #32.

    Previous Colbert easter eggs:

    Amazing Spider-Man #562, Secret Invasion #3, Ms. Marvel #27 and She-Hulk #29, Incredible Hercules #117, X-Men: Legacy #211, Young X-Men #2, Amazing Spider-Man #556, She Hulk #28, Incredible Hercules #116, Amazing Spider-Man #556, Secret Invasion #1


    Tags: Immigration, Ken Ellis, Marvel, Stephen Colbert, The Colbert Report